Last week we saw the demise of Julie, and the victory of Kimberly. I hope Kimberly goes all the way – I think she might be rising to the metaphorical occasion – and I didn’t give her enough credit off the top. At Julie’s departure, Cecelia was making it all about her, whining and feeling like she should have been the one to go home. All that said, she totally should have. Her look was awful.
Another morning! This time, they awaken to surprise boxes in their apartment… I’ve awakened to a couple surprise boxes in my lifetime, but none of mine had tennis shoes and athletic attire in them. With the box is a note requesting that designers meet everyone at a gym in Washington Heights.
Cecelia is definitely not in any mood to be wearing athletic attire. Something’s about to happen with her…
Designers are wearing matching “Heidi Klum for New Balance shirts” – nice product placement there, Klum. They all turn up on a track, and I’m seeing Tim Gunn in running shoes – I can’t deal with that.
More of this genre-crossing madness after the jump!
Ugh – another team challenge, and everyone hates Bert. Natch. Everyone has to run around the track – the top 4 runners will be team leaders. 200 meter dash around the track… you seriously want creatives to run?
Here we go Cecelia! She’s done. She hates the competition. She wants to go home. She’s talking to Heidi and Tim. Heidi basically says “The door is thatta way!”
And she’s gone. Later taters!
It turns out that she’s just quitting… you know, I have mixed feelings. 1) Good for her – if it isn’t working for you, do what you gotta do… but C’MON! You got this far? And you’re gonna bail out? But, if she isn’t happy, she should be gone. Can you imagine all of the hundreds of other auditioners that are looking at her and hating her right now? I’d be pissed.
And they run! Josh McKinley with the eyebrows is tearing ass on that track like he’s being chased by good taste.
Becky and Bert are near the end, and Olivier bites it. Bites it hard! They even give the slow-mo replay… damn. Olivier has a serious bruise situation on his knee, and appears to be crashing out. Shock, perhaps? Poor thing probably hasn’t moved that fast in a long time, and the endorphins and adrenaline rush probably overwhelmed his central nervous system. He has the boniest knees I’ve ever seen, by the way. Turns out the boy had a bit of a panic attack. Dang!
Josh McKinley wins, with Bryce, Anthony Ryan and cute Viktor. All the little gay boys! Gays can run! Ah, cutaway to Bert accounting how many of the teams would work badly for him. The choose up teams – all the weak kids are left behind — Becky, Danielle and Bert. Bert ends up on Anthony Ryan’s team – and of course, he’s unhappy.
Twist!!! Since Cecelia has run off like a little bitch, the team of Viktor and Olivier can bring back an eliminated contestant. And who is it? Snohomish native Josh C! Yay!
Now, the challenge. Since Heidi Klum has been designing for New Balance for the last year, she wants the designers to come up with something that fits into her design – incorporating denim and/or suede. The winning look will be produced, and added to her line – HUGE! F*CKIN’! PRIZE! – sold exclusively on Amazon.com
Teams are sent to “caucus” and sketch… nice! Tim used the word “caucus” – I’m pleased. Anya and Josh McK are not convinced of Becky’s taste and design skill. Laura and Anthony Ryan just dislike everything Bert’s doing. There’s some serious third-wheel action happening around here. Tension makes good TV, I suppose! They’re off to Mood and back to the workroom and told they have only until 11am. Ugh!
The door opens in a really creepy way… and Josh C is back in the workroom!!! It’s a good door opening! Not a creepy visitor thing.
Back to Becky feeling left out… sad face. Josh McKinley is being WAYYYY too much of a bitch here – queen without a kingdom….
Anthony Ryan’s trying to include Bert, but Bert is being a petulant child… mumbling and grumping. God, he’s going to be around a LOOONNNNGGG time – he’s too much good drama! Bert forgets Anthony’s name, and in the confessional mentions that he forgets peoples names whom aren’t significant. Blerg… he’s just a dick.
Josh gives us the new favorite phrase “The Klum of Doom” – as Heidi comes into the room to help and mentor with Tim. Heidi hates on Bryce’s team’s work and they pretty much have to start over. Heidi hates on Cute Viktor’s team as well. She isn’t too pleased with Anthony Ryan’s team either – too dressed up if it’s going to go with tennis shoes. Josh McK’s team is also getting kicked down a bit. With Becky being relegated to the third wheel position, she’s at risk of being the sacrificial lamb.
Since Heidi is SO worried about them, she gives them until 4:00 a.m!
Josh McK calls Becky’s work dowdy. Whoa… what a dick. Anya is trying to make nice with Becky, but Josh just keeps up with the bitchy queen routine – seriously honey, you aren’t interesting enough to treat people like that. Clearly it’s late at night – Becky recognizes her own frustration. But, not to worry – Josh apologizes in a way that SEEMS fairly sincere – he seems to recognize his own rampant douchebaggery sufficiently and makes peace with Becky in a stall of the ladies room… gross, but the effort needed made.
Anthony Ryan and Laura have their own third wheel drama with Bert, who seems to refuse to play as part of a team. Any freshman psychology major can see that Bert’s just insecure about being around all those youngsters, and he refuses to bend. At the same time, I’m sure Bert is seeing it as his last chance at doing anything relevant in design with his career. Sad face 
Morning has come! Designers are WAYYY sleep deprived… model fittings happen, and they’re finalizing for the runway. Clearly Bert has violated some sewing machine etiquette and offended Josh McK. Although many things offend Josh McK, I’m sure, Bert is just being dickish…again… and his rebuttal, while intended to “rise above” the fray of the annoying little people like Josh McKinley, comes off as being childish, and not particularly clever. The Project Runway editors really seem to enjoy making Bert into the bad guy…
Off to the Runway!
Heidi comes out looking like she’s headed to Studio 54 in a sparkly jumper situation, and the newly returned Josh C is wearing a plaid shirt that I want. The usual suspects with guest judge Erin Wasson! The show begins…
Viktor’s team is all about gray and motorcycle jackets. Olivier sends out a long skirt in that collection that could be cool… but isn’t.
Bryce is back! He sends out a tucked shirt dress with big snaps that’s really quite cool, after his weakness in previous weeks. Danielle’s green top is horrible. She’s totally delusional with those creepy, chiffon tops.
Anthony Ryan’s outfit is awful, but at least he knows it. Too much time babysitting Bert. I’m sad to report that Bert’s outfit really is the best one of the group. At least it looks the most together.
Josh McKinley’s team sends out a weird shredded vest situation that actually isn’t awful. Becky’s outfit isn’t great – although she confesses that it wasn’t entirely her design. Anya’s maxidress (seriously, can she do anything else???) is fairly chic. But I’d love to see her make a suit. Seriously Anya… you gotta try harder here!
Judges commence judgement!
Anthony Ryan’s team busts open when they hit judgement time! It doesn’t help that Bert is gloating like a child. Not helping Bert! But I’m sure he can’t be bothered to care about anyone.
Josh McKinley’s team – Heidi feels like they took the remaining time to bedazzle their stuff. Ha! Becky’s outfit gets called out for proportion issues – Josh McKinley owns up to his part in Becky’s outfit. Josh McKinley is madly in love with power, and can’t be productive. Lemme guess – he’s a recovering drug addict so enraptured with the notion of doing something useful in his life, that he’ll throw anyone under the bus to survive.
Backstage, Anthony Ryan initiates the conversation with Bert, and Bert expresses his butt-hurtness, but Bert, c’mon – you’re up there giving up passive aggressive little snipes on the runway, and you don’t expect Anthony Ryan to tell you what a little bitch you are? Get over yourself. That exchange ends with Anthony Ryan offering the new best phrase of the night “I haven’t probably gotten this pissed since i got cancer.” Awesome! He’s totally growing on me.
Viktor’s outfit gets a face full of love, Olivier’s long prairie skirt is likened to a dirndl (ha!), and even Josh C gets love for his work.
Bryce finally gets some love! He does some awesome! Kimberly’s outfit is okay, but Danielle’s green gauzy top gets called out for doing the same ugly ass top.
Designers leave, and judges start sniping at each other! Heidi hates Anthony Ryan, and Nina comes to his defense…
Winner! Actually, there will be TWO! Two peeps who will have their designs manufactured! That is kind of badass, especially considering it’s only the 5th episode.
Viktor and Josh McKinley! A shared victory but a victory nonetheless! Well, sort of… It’s Anya’s maxidress that’ll be manufactured, but since Josh McKinley was team captain he wins… he’s enjoying HIS victory!
Cute Viktor's winning look!
Anya's maxi-dress that got Josh McKinley the win... ahh, it pays to be team captain!
And, going home? Danielle… although Heidi has no compunction about telling Anthony Ryan that if it was up to her, he’d be out. Huge disagree… Anthony Ryan isn’t the issue here.
Yaaawwwwnnnnnn.......bye Danielle.
Next week involves working with children. I might have to skip that one!
